Q: Why can’t I move on from my ex, why can’t I let go?
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This is a question I receive a lot and one I have a lot of compassion and experience with.
This is a common experience and the truth is relationships often take time to release. They are deeply intimate and emotional experiences and so moving on from these types of situations or relationships overnight is not the expectation we should be placing on ourselves.
There is a grieving process that must be honoured.
But beyond this, on the other side of the conversation 0 which is often the conversation I have as people are intuitively guided to seek my support during these experiences - is… energetic connections and blocks holding the connection or sense that you can’t move on in place.
These are situations that are not part of the natural grieving process of letting go of a relationship. And they can have a very negative effect on the person, such as keeping them in a limiting loop where they feel they can’t let go, no matter what they try.
The most common findings I see during these sessions are energetic blocks and attachments found within the Akashic Records. These can be created from past life experiences as well as within the current incarnation.
These blocks include:
Soulmate Contracts
These sound very romantic but they are anything but…
Soulmate Contracts can actually be incredibly disempowering.
When a Soulmate Contract is in place, Souls can come back together again and again over many incarnations, even when the relationship or connection no longer serves them to do so.
This can create a relationship that feels like it keeps repeating itself, even when you know deep down that it isn't right for you anymore.
It can leave you feeling like you are constantly searching for ‘The One’ person to love, or constantly being drawn back towards the same person or the same relationship dynamic.
For some people, this can eventually lead to feeling bitter, frustrated or disillusioned about relationships generally.
Energetic Attachments - Cords and Hooks
Energetic Attachments are another common finding I see within the Akashic Records.
There is an important distinction between Cords of Attachment and Hooks of Attachment, because although both can create a connection between Souls, they have a different energetic quality.
Both can be found within families, close friendships and intimate relationships, and they can create a connection that continues to influence us even when we consciously want to move forward.
Cords of Attachment
Cords of Attachment are more subtle energetically, in comparison to a hook.
They can form naturally within relationships when we develop a strong desire to help someone, care for them or take responsibility for them.
You may not even realise that a Cord of Attachment is present.
Instead, you may simply notice that you remain slightly preoccupied with someone, feel unusually responsible for them, or find that a part of your energy continues to be focused on them.
Cords can create a lower-level depletion within the energetic field and they are important to clear when they come up.
I have also had my own very personal experience with the strength of these cords.
When I was first learning about these experiences, I naively thought that Cords of Attachment didn't seem very ‘heavy’ or as strong as some of the other blocks I had experienced.
I was immediately shown just how strong they could be.
I was continually being brought back into a relationship with someone I was trying to move on from. I ran into them 15 times in 3 days, accompanied by an intense pain in my heart - which is where the cord was located.
It was one of those experiences that completely changed my understanding of just how powerful these energetic connections can feel.
Hooks of Attachment
Hooks are different and when they are present they can feel far more intrusive.
A Hook of Attachment is connected to an energetic dynamic where one Soul is attempting to influence or control another Soul's thoughts or feelings, often unconsciously.
One example can be within an intimate relationship where one person creates an energetic dynamic that makes the other person feel that they need them in order to be happy.
If the other person buys into this energy, the Hook can attach and create a programme that becomes disempowering - something like co-dependency, for example.
And sometimes the relationship has already ended, but the Hook is still there.
This is something I see as particularly relevant when people ask me, ‘Why can't I move on from my ex?’
You may no longer be in a relationship with this person, but still feel incredibly preoccupied with them. You may think about them constantly, feel pulled towards them, or feel like you simply cannot break the energetic connection no matter how much you consciously want to.
This is why Hooks can be so important to explore when someone feels like they have tried everything to move on, but something continues to keep them attached.
Both Cords and Hooks of Attachment can occur in relationships, families and close friendships.
My own experience
I also have my own personal experience with this, which is actually part of what led me to working so deeply within the Akasha.
I know what it feels like to desperately want to move on from something and yet feel like you simply can’t, no matter how much you try.
I had tried many powerful modalities - Psych-K, Internal Family Systems, Constellation work, trauma work, the list continues. I learnt a lot during this time and had some insightful experiences, but the layer I was being called to wasn't being reached.
I felt a call to go much deeper. And when I answered that, in just one session with Akashic Clearing, this issue was gone.
Not distracted from or avoided, just a bone-deep absence and amazement that something which had once taken up so much space in my brain simply wasn't there anymore. I didn’t think about my ex, I didn’t really care about my ex (apart from wishing him well), I had finally released him and within that released myself.
It was an incredible experience that honestly altered my life and impacted how I saw the world in a big way.
If any of the above symptoms are ringing alarm bells or resonating with you, you are not alone.
These are tender experiences that can feel incredibly frustrating and limiting, particularly when you know you want to move forward but something feels like it is keeping you connected.
And sometimes, what feels like ‘I just can't get over my ex’ can be worth exploring on a deeper level.
If you’d like personalised support to explore your situation, please feel free to reach out. I’d love to support you.
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Frequently Asked Questions
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The Akashic Records are often described as an energetic library or field of consciousness that contains the story of every soul. Within the Records are the experiences, lessons, gifts and patterns that have shaped your soul's journey.
In my work, the Akashic Records provide a space to explore your soul's gifts, the lessons you're here to learn, and the deeper patterns influencing your current experiences. Alongside the guidance that comes through your Records, we also work with personalised energetic clearing, gently releasing what no longer needs to be carried and creating space for greater understanding, healing and transformation.
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An Akashic Records Reading is a personalised session where we explore your soul's gifts, lessons and the deeper patterns shaping your life. We uncover the experiences, energetic influences and root causes connected to what you're currently navigating, while also working with personalised energetic clearing to support lasting change.
My intention is to create a grounded, compassionate space where you can better understand yourself, make sense of your experiences, and move forward with greater awareness, self-trust and empowerment.
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There isn't a perfect time to book an Akashic Records Reading.
Many people arrive when they're navigating recurring patterns, moving through a season of change, wanting to understand themselves more deeply, or feeling an undeniable pull towards the Akashic Records. Others simply know there's something beneath the surface of their experiences that they're ready to explore.
If you've found yourself returning to the idea of an Akashic Records Reading or recognised yourself throughout this article, it may be a sign that you're ready to deepen your understanding of yourself and the experiences you're navigating.
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Relationships are one of the most common reasons people book a reading.
Whether you're navigating the end of a relationship, recurring relationship patterns, family dynamics or wanting to understand why someone has had such a profound impact on your life, the Akashic Records can offer insight into the deeper lessons, energetic patterns and influences at play.
As we gain greater understanding, we also work with personalised energetic clearing to support the release of what no longer needs to be carried, creating space for greater compassion, healing and a different way of relating moving forward.
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For many people, the reading is just the beginning.
As the guidance settles and the energetic clearing continues to integrate, new insights often emerge over the weeks and months that follow. Some people experience immediate shifts, while others gradually notice that situations which once felt confusing begin to make sense, emotional patterns soften, or they're relating to themselves and their lives in a different way.
You'll also receive a personalised PDF a recording of your session and a post-clearing follow up call, allowing you to revisit the guidance whenever you need and continue integrating what has unfolded.
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Yes.
All of my Akashic Records Readings are held online via Zoom, allowing you to receive the same depth of guidance and energetic clearing wherever you are in the world.
Following your session, you'll receive a personalised PDF and recording, giving you the opportunity to revisit your reading and continue working with the guidance and energetic clearing long after the session has finished.
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Both sessions explore your soul through the Akashic Records, but they have different intentions.
The Soul Essence Reading is centred around understanding who you are at a soul level. It explores your soul's gifts, natural strengths, driving energies, purpose and the qualities your soul came here to embody. Many people describe it as a profound sense of recognition, helping them understand why they are the way they are, reconnect with the truth of who they have always been and work with the natural patterns they face in a different way.
The Soul Awakening Akashic Records Reading includes this Soul Essence exploration as part of the session, then goes deeper. Alongside understanding your unique soul blueprint, we explore the intentions and experiences that have brought you to the reading, uncover the deeper patterns, root causes and soul lessons shaping your current challenges, and work with personalised energetic clearing to release what no longer needs to be carried.
If you're looking to understand yourself at a soul level, the Soul Essence Reading is a beautiful place to begin. If you're wanting that understanding alongside guidance and energetic clearing for what you're currently navigating, the Soul Awakening Akashic Records Reading offers a more in-depth experience.